The Things Kids Say...

Teaching 6th grade provides a lot of interesting experiences. Kids really do say funny things sometimes. Some things they say to me are sweet, some are cute, some are harsh, and some are just strange. This BLOG entry is dedicated to some of the crazy kid quotes I've heard over the years.

After calling a student by their first and last name, another student said, "Wow. How do you know everyone's last names?"

Student: "How old are you?"
Me: "How old do you think I am?"
Student: "You don't look a day over 22. So how old are you?"
Me: "30."
Student: "30?! Oh! You need to find yourself a husband!"

One year I had a boy in my math class who thought it was very entertaining to respond to everything I said with, "Are you sure?"
For example:
Me: "So, the answer to number five is 32."
Boy: "Are you sure?"
Another example:
Me: "Your homework tonight is the worksheet I gave you in class."
Boy: "Are you sure?"
You get the idea. One day in class I had had quite enough of his "Are you sure?"s, so I said to him: "If you say, 'Are you sure?' one more time I'll send you to Think Time!"
Boy: "Are you..." and he quickly slapped his hands over his mouth.
I admit I couldn't help but laugh.

Ancient Egypt test question: In at least one paragraph, explain why the Nile river is often called the 'life-blood of Egypt'.
Student Answers:

• It could be because it meant every thing to them. It would give them water. I gave them water for there plants. It gave them the ability to travel faster and cary hever things that they would trade. It expeshally helped them for wars and other things like that.

• They used it to live, for irrigation, and for their cows. They drank the water, grew crops. And fed their cows who gave milk. Which left them with strong bones to get more water from the Nile.

• The Nile river is called the life-blood of Egypt because it provides water. A nother reason why is it grows plants like the reed plant other nowen as papyrus. And it helps grows food. the farmers use it to grow there crops. It helps ceep animals and the Egyptians alive and usually fish live in water.

• The Nile was how the Egyptians survived, it was used for irrigation, building, water, the animals needwater so the Egyptians could have bacon ect.

Student: "You don't dress like a teacher."
Me: "Well, I wear jeans on Fridays because it's a short day for students and I have to do things around the room once you're gone, like clean up and climb on chairs. I can dress more formally if you think I should."
Student: "No, that's not what I mean. You just don't wear weird sweaters and apple pins."
Me: "I can wear apple pins if you want me too."
Student: "No! I don't want you to wear an apple pin. I like the way you dress. I just mean you dress better than most teachers. I mean, you wear things from American Eagle. It's cool."
Me: "Oh. Well, thank you."

Student: "If you weren't a teacher, what would you want to be?"
Me: "A Broadway star."
Student: "Oh ya. I can see that happening because you're so pretty."
Me: "Thank you!"

Student: "Do you want to buy my school pictures? I know you said you like them, but my mom doesn't. So, do you want to buy them?"

My first year of teaching, the day before we went off for winter break, I stood in front of the class opening Christmas gifts the students had given me. One girl gave me a ceramic figurine of two snowmen - a girl and a boy - snuggling close together in the cold.
Me: "This is a perfect gift because I don't have..."
Boy in class: "... a husband."
Me: "Ahem. I was going to say, 'very many Christmas decorations.'"

Following are two excerpts from student essays about the extinction of a dinosaur called the Coelophysis. They first read a story giving a lot of possible causes for the death of this group of dinosaurs. Their assignment was to decide which theory they thought really happened and give supporting evidence for their answer.

• I think the reason why they all died in the same place is because they ran out of food and water supplies. Or, there might have been a big fight to the death, and after they died they ate each other because they were cannibals.

• I think a drought struck and all the water dried up. Then the Coelophysis laid down and died, some of them in puddles.

While out helping the students who were on Safety Patrol duty, I noticed one student who was yelling at the other children to try to get them to stop running.
Me: "You shouldn't just yell at the kids to walk because..."
Student: "I know. I know why. It hurts their ego-system."

World War II Test Question: Name the Central Powers.
Answer: Friendship, Love, and Caring
World War II Test Question: Name the Axis Powers.
Answer: Team Work, Hard Work, Niceness, and Happiness

Kids... you've got to love them.